So I’ve lost my mojo. Writers block. and I’ve not understood why? Until just now. Driving back home on the long road after a few consults with framing. This is why:
I like to save the World. I do. I like to match make and solve the world’s problems. And lately with Molly at her new school I’ve had to adjust to some of the backgrounds some of the kids in her class come from. Some of them come from huge poor, poor families, one little boy gets dondered around by his mom. And it’s tough for me. I just want to save them all. I want to step in and cuddle them and take them all home with me.
But you see, the thing is, is that you can’t save them all. In fact you can probably not save any. It’s so hard to accept this. And so I pray for these kids. I pray so hard for their safety and their future.
We are so surrounded by ugliness towards children. Raping 2 year olds, burning babies down in shacks, hungry children and it breaks my heart. It does. It cripples me and I can barely function with the helplessness of it all.
So I’ve hardened myself to all of this. I’m trying to. I can help in little ways. A smile, a hug, bags of old clothes given to safe houses.
And then I’ll come home to my two, who are loved and disciplined, and fed and clothed and bloody spoiled rotten.
All this has swirled around in my head for weeks now. I can’t save the world. Or the rhinos. or all the helpless abused dogs floating around facebook. Or the little boy who lost his leg after the Boston Bombing. Some things just are.
I have to distance myself, and choose happy stories, help when I can, harden myself when I can’t and live.
Live a happy life.