When you use the ‘r’ word and people shit themselves…..piggy backing off The Reluctant Mom


Today I made a booboo on the Reluctant mom’s Blog Post. see link http://reluctantmom.wordpress.com/2013/05/27/when-you-use-the-r-word-and-people-shit-themselves/ . I commented. A commenter before me mentioned assuming the “R” word was for retard, remedial,respect.

Well, I quickly assumed the word “R” stood for racism. Someone named Tania took offense. I think the offense was more on my comment:

“I thought the R word was Racism, but then I remembered you lived in Cape Town and there aren’t many racists there…” than for the word “racism”.

She then proceeded to give me a right good revving on judging people and places. See here: “I have to ask you not to judge on any of the other provinces being more racist.  How would you know?  Who are you to judge?  Every province has it’s own issues and problematic groups of people.  Some are more laid back Some are more vocal Some just rather keep quiet.  I grew up in Cape Town but have been living in Gauteng for 12 years.  Racism is everywhere Countess…  it’s whether you choose to be apart of it or not…  and not to judge people and places…”

Well since I’m not one to start a fight on someone elses’ blog, I’ll answer Tania on my Blog. So Tania, here is my reply to you.

Firstly, I apologise if you feel offended. That was not my intention. You see, here in the Eastern Cape, what we say is usually what we mean. In other words : ….but then I remembered you lived in Cape Town and there aren’t many racists there…”, Perhaps I did not put it eloquently but I see Cape Town as a liberal city, everybody loves everybody and many don’t see colour. Very simple and to the point. An absolute complement to Cape Tonians. A generalised comment to be sure. But then I would have thought you’d have understood that.

To be fair, if it’s a sensitive topic for one, I can see my comment coming across as judgemental and generalised to the other cities and people of South Africa.  But at the end of the day, you have to give me the benefit of the doubt, and if you don’t, well, sorry for you. It’s not what I meant, so you have to just deal with it,’coz it’s not what I meant.

I was extremely embarrassed at my dressing down. I blushed when I read it. Not out of shame, but out embarrassment at my public chastisement.

I think bringing up racism is always going to be touchy here in South Africa. But I will not, FOR ONE MINUTE, sit down and be called someone who judges other provinces as being more racist or someone who judges people or places. You will not sit there and respond to my comment and then assume something of me.

I will not allow it.

That’s all.


4 responses »

  1. Talk about getting the wrong end the stick!

    It’s the kind of comment I would make (and similarly get myself into trouble).

  2. Tania here. I must apologise to you too. I was overly sensitive on that day no doubt. I however still feel that you cannot judge, or should I say, comment on a province or city in our country if you have not lived there. You are qualified to comment on the Eastern Cape, Cape Town too if you have lived there and can compare the two for sure but from my perspective, the people in Gauteng are far more tolerant and understanding and friendlier and I am born and raised in Cape Town up until age 28. I will then accept that your comparison is with Eastern Cape and Cape Town and not the other provinces or cities in South Africa. Peace!

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