Yesterday Pandora’s box was ripped open again. You know, so wide open, that you see the black, dark, ugly things in life.
Saturday’s dreadful bus accident outside Cradock was horrific. I found out yesterday morning that my good friend’s sister’s little boy was killed. 10 years old. Killed instantly. The irony was, was that this was the first time his mom allowed him to go to a Sports match in the bus. She usually took him. This time she allowed hime to go on the bus and then by pure flook, he was killed. Along with the headmaster.
What is the sense in that? Where is the sense in all this? When you don’t know the people involved in a tragedy, you remain detached, ‘coz you know, we live in South Africa and you hear horrific things all the time. But, when it’s someone you know,it puts it all in perspective. The pain, the anger, the pure tragedy of losing a little boy. Just 3 years older than my little boy.
May God bless them and comfort them in their pain and the horrific road they have ahead. May his little brother, his Mom and Dad find comfort in You and someday have peace and acceptance in their souls from this terrible tragedy.
oh, God, I pray this.
Today I feel like reflecting on my many blessings:
- Thank you God for my little boy. So filled with wonder for the world. He received such an EXCELLENT report this last term. So filled with humour even when someone annoys him and trys to knock him down. So filled with excitement and enthusiasm for each day and each new thing he discovers. So gentle and kind with his sister. So caring for Molly and helping her down stairs or berating me if I forget something. God CHOSE him to be Molly’s brother. That’s a VERY special job.
- And my little precious girl, Molly. Dad and I have learnt, especially on Friday, that you need protection from the venomous people of this world. The toxic people who don’t have your best interests at heart. Toxicity comes in many forms, disguised and spewing from people’s selfish mouths. We WILL protect you and we WILL cut dead any baggage that pulls us down. We don’t need ignorant people in our lives. You and Aidan are our first priority.
So thank you God, for my two beautiful children. Our two most precious people who John and I will protect with our all our heart and soul.
Basically, I’m run off my feet at the moment. I feel absolutely shattered. And happy. I’m ticking tasks off the list as I go. Still have plenty to do and I’m still frazzled.
Tomorrow we’re off to Josh Groban. I’ve left John and the kids. He has three parties to go to. Phewww, so pleased I’ve escaped having to go those functions.
Then Monday it’s the city for a GREAT big shop. I’m convening the Golden Age and have to buy ingredients for 120 people. So much to still do for that. Then after that, three more functions next week. Then the following week will be tackled closer to the time.
fucker has decided that the coastal schools have to go back a week earlier than normal. This is putting me out big time. We arrive back from holiday and then three days later school starts. That means I have to buy stationery and uniforms next week. Thank goodness my Christmas shopping is done.
My little chap had his prizegiving today. They put on a Nativity Play and the kids recited poems and gave orals. It was so sweet and my heart filled with pride, absolute love and happiness. Such a happy moment for me as a mom.
We put up the Christmas Tree today after going into the veld to find and chop down a tree. Awesome looking tree.
Today my kids and I bought two boxes of goodies for the Santa’s Shoebox Project. Molly bought for a 6-7 year old girl and Aidan bought for 4-5 year old boy. I have to get the kids to decorate and wrap the shoe box. Molls will need lots of help from me. Social awareness is what I’m trying to get into Aidan’s head. He needs to understand that some kids don’t have anything and that clothes are even awesome to get.
My little chap is going through a stage where he resents receiving any kind of clothing item as a gift. It’s so wrong and CRACKS me! I really have one wish for my children, and that is that they grow up hungry. Not hungry in the physical sense but hungry in the yearning sense. Hunger for ambition and challenges. Hunger for new horizons and knowledge.
It’s tough getting the balance right with children. You don’t want to break them and you don’t want to spoil them. It REALLY is the most difficult job or responsibility on Earth.
My friend Kim was telling me yesterday, at the famous boomgate stop, that anti-depressant usage has gone up by 400% and that we should all go back to basics. Basics like walking barefoot in the wet grass. Walking outside. Just stopping and smelling the roses. This is easier said than done. Why are we so hell-bent on chasing our tails. Why do we take it all so seriously?
I’ve just had my mom and cousin spend a few days with me. My mom had to come up for a Grandparents day at the school. My mom is not a conventional Grandmother. She doesn’t own a tea set, doily or any Moondrops or Vanderbilt perfume. Or anything with a lavender scent. Bless her.
She is a young granny. 61 years of age. She probably swears a tad too much and is an absolute drama queen.
My cousin has just found out that she’s pregnant. She worked on the cruise liners for 5 years and met a man, fell in love and made a baby. Very complicated. By all accounts he seems very keen to be in her and the child’s life and phones and emails on a daily basis all the way from Mexico or on the cruise liners if he’s on a contract. My cousin is pure of heart. A really good person that spends a lot of her time preserving good energy and seeking calmness. A complete feathery stroker. Semi-precious stone, crystals, natural healer kinda gal. She will walk out of a room if she feels a negative energy and will only enter when she feels the positive energy return. Her feathery stroker nonsense goes COMPLETELY over my and John’s head. We accommodate it and tolerate it in the house because she is seriously a good person.
Unfortunately, babies have a tendencies to knock the bullshit out of anything. They center you with no pomp or ceremony or warning. They are relentless and demanding of you. They allow you to dream and romantacise whilst you are pregnant and then have the ability to jolt you with reality when they are born. They pummel and mould you into being the best mom that you can possibly be. They suck the memory out of you and fade everything around you into insignificance so that all you think about is them and all you do…. is for them.
But besides all this adjustment and difference, my cousin is in for the best ride of her life. The best joy. The best love. The best that life will throw at her. I wish her luck…and I’m so happy for her.